Weakest Link! TMM Style!
by Kyua the Aqua Faerie
Summary: Masaya-bashing, a crazy authoress for a host, what can go wrong? EVERYTHING!
1. We love torture!

Kyua here! Anyone up for another round of Let's Torture The Characters of  
Tokyo Mew Mew?  
People: --  
Oh, well. I'm putting Ichigo, Ryou, Masaya, Kish, Mint, and Purin through  
30 minutes of terror while playing...THE WEAKEST LINK!!   
Disclaimer: If I owned TMM..Ryou would get Ichigo...Masaya would get eaten  
by a Chimera Anima...Kish would fall into a pool of mutant slime...oh, if  
only I owned TMM...  
  
The Weakest Link! 30 Minutes of Horror!  
Kyua: Hello everyone, and welcome to The Weakest Link! dum dum de dum  
Let's meet our team!  
Ichigo: Hi, I'm Ichigo, age 11, a Mew Mew.  
Fanboys: squeeeeeeeee  
Masaya: glare  
Fanboys: O.O  
Masaya: I'm Masaya, age 12, The Blue Knight!   
Ichigo: NO!!! Why didn't you tell me! sob  
Masaya: errr..  
Kish: I'm Kish, age unknown, and I want to take over the Earth! And get  
Ichigo to like me!  
Audience: Boooooooo!  
Ryou: --;; I'm Ryou, age 15....WHAT'S THAT CRAZY AUTHORESS DOING  
HERE???points at Kyua  
Kyua: smiles sweetly //thinking// I'll get you for that...  
Mint: I'm Mint! I'm...OH NOOOO! looks at watch I NEED TEA!!!  
HURRY..quick..lyy...faints  
Kyua: --;; Are you ready? Let's play...gets scorched by fire YOW!  
Purin: You forgot me, no da!  
Kyua: Fine, go ahead.  
Purin: I'm Purin, age 10, na no da! I'm a Mew Mew, too, na no da!  
Kyua: Letttttsss...GO!  
Ryou: That's not what you say...  
Kyua: Too bad! So sad! D-gets clonked on head  
Purin: That's better, no da!  
Kyua: Oww...Question 1! Ichigo!  
Ichigo: Bank!   
Kyua: There's no money in the bank....  
Ichigo: Time's a-wasting! Nya!  
Kyua: Which of these colors is pretty? Blue, Pink, Black, or Yellow?  
Ichigo: Pink!  
Kyua: Sorry, black.  
Ichigo: But I like pink!  
Kyua: But I like BLACK! And I make the QUESTIONS!!! Masaya, Who is the  
current president?  
Masaya: Bush.  
Kyua: Correct. Kish, Who is the hottest girl-  
Kish: ICHIGO!!  
Kyua: Sorry, that is incorrect.  
Kish: WHAT?????kills Kyua  
Director: Uhhh..Commercial Break!!!!!  
  
Oh, no! We have no host! And Mint is out cold! What will happen now? Read  
to find out!  
Kyua Out! 


	2. The insananity continues

Kyua here! I was doing my EOG when this hit me! gets smacked on head by  
anvil  
Ow... anyways, here's part two to Weakest Link: TMM Style!  
Disclaimer: Look in my other chapter; I'm sure you'll figure it out  
SOMEDAY.  
  
Ichigo: Great, Kish, just great, now we have no host!  
Kish: Yes we do! -  
Taruto: HI!!!!  
Purin: TARUTO! glomp  
Taruto: Kish, what the heck is THIS girl doing here? You-  
Kish: Let's start! ;  
Taruto: I quit! walks offstage  
Purin: No...TARUTO!!! ;;  
Kyua: ahhh...  
Ryou: She's..she's alive!  
Kyua: I WILL kill Kish! types into her computer  
Kish: I am a baka..lalala....goofy grin I'll go jump off a  
building..lalala..jumps off building  
Masaya: That was....disturbing.  
Ichigo: --  
Ryou: WILL SOMEONE START THE FREAKING GAME????  
Kyua: Uhh..Commercial!!  
-commercial-  
Kish: la...la...dies  
-end commercial-  
dum dum da dum  
Kyua: Welcome to the Weakest Link! Let's meet our team!  
Ryou: You already said that.  
Kyua: Ummm...First round, start!  
Ryou: This is the second round.  
Kyua: You think you can do it better? Do it yourself, then!  
Ryou: shoves her out of the way Let's play the Weakest Link!  
Everyone but Ryou: --;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;  
Ryou: Ichigo, What is two two?  
Ichigo: FOUR!  
Ryou: What's two times two?  
Ichigo: Huh?  
Ryou: But the answer's still four. You failed. I'm here to kill you!  
Everyone: .....  
Ryou: HEY! Who switched my script????  
Kyua and Taruto: sniker  
Ryou: growls MASAYA! a.k.a. Enourmous Bighead! What is 50?  
Masaya: ZERO!!!  
Ryou: Sorry, wrong.  
Masaya: Why you -----!  
Ichigo: Masaya!!  
Ryou: Who's after him?  
Ichigo: Mint passed out from lack of tea, Kish jumped out a window, you're  
hosting...  
Purin: Purin is left, no da!  
Ryou: Purin, What is Chinese for 'it is'?  
Purin: I don't know, no da!  
Ryou: Correct![1]  
Masaya: Wait, she got her question and I didn't???  
Kyua: NEVER question the almighty authoress!!zaps Masaya with thunderbolt  
Masaya: dies  
Ichigo:  
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO  
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO  
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO  
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!  
windows shatter  
Ryou: erk..I..think we need new windows...  
Director: COMMERCIAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Crew, shut her up!  
Ichigo: OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOgets gagged  
  
Hee...I was bored...very bored...  
R&R  
Flames will be used to power the world's biggest flamer-run furnice.  
[1] I'm not quite sure of the exact translation of "no da," but I think  
that's close. Please tell me if I'm wrong. 


	3. Going going goingkeep the crazy going

OK, first things first. Actions will now be put in ( )'s.  
Kyua warp in!   
(Eats basket of cookies KrysOfDeath gave her)  
YUM!  
(Realizes that they're really oatmeal cookies)  
YUCKKKK!--;  
Oh, well, thankies to reviewers! Here's a biscut! (throws biscuts to  
reviewers)  
Reviewers: We're not dogs, you know.  
Kyua: My granny made too many for breakfast. I'm getting rid of them.  
Reviewers: .....  
All TWO of them! WOOT!  
----------------------------------------  
Weakest Link TMM Style Part the third  
-commercial-  
Masaya:(dances around a plush cat)If you're pure of heart and TRUELY  
believe, I'll show you the way to Kittentopia! (cat plushie opens to  
reveal lots of cats)  
British person: Kiitteeenntopiaaaaaa, a world of kitties...  
-end commercial-  
dum dum de dum  
Ryou: err...  
Ichigo:mmphh!  
mphhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh  
hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh  
hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!  
Ryou: Nani? What did you say?  
Ichigo: (rips off gag)  
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO  
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO  
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!  
Ryou: Oh. --;  
Ryou: Let's play the Weakest Link! Voting time!  
Ichigo. There's only me and Purin left.  
Ryou: (splashes Mint with cold water)  
Mint: NANI? who what when where how why..?  
Ryou: Now there are three of you!  
Everyone: --;  
Mint: You can't do this to me! I KNOW THE SHERIFF!!  
Kyua: (pops in)I KNOW WHAT TO DO!  
Purin: It's that authoress lady, na no da! She can use her tremendous  
authoress powers to decide, no da!  
Kyua: At least one person is respectful of me!  
Purin: I'm just scared of you, no da!  
Kyua: --;  
Ryou: (tries to hide)  
Kyua: That's MY hosting spot! (throws Ryou back to his original place)  
Ryou: Oww...  
Kyua: Third-or-fourth-or-whatever round start! Ichigo! Why does a snake  
slither?  
Ichigo: Because it has no legs?  
Kyua: No, because it can't crawl!! HAHAHA!  
Ichigo: --  
Kyua: Mint, Why are you so stuck up?  
Mint: I don't know.  
Kyua: Because you're a rich brat. Ryou! Wha-  
Ryou: I don't wanna play this dumb game. (sulks)  
Kyua: Fine, whatever. Purin! Who is the main character in Angelic Layer?  
Purin: Purin knows, no da! It's Misaki, no da!  
Kyua: Correct! Ichigo!  
Ichigo: BANK!  
Kyua: What i-  
dum dum de dum  
Kyua: (bashes in speakers)I hate that sound....anyways, time to vote!  
Who is the weakest link?  
Voice: Purin was, for the first time in her life, a strong and essential  
part of the team. However, Ichigo was the only one who banked money. The  
weakest link was..well..everyone else got their question wrong? Who will  
get voted off? Find out...next time.  
--------------------------------------  
Kyua: eh..heehee..  
Ryou: That stunk.  
Kyua: I don't care what you think. What do you think, readers? Please  
review? (gives puppy dog eyes)I thought this up while reading an article  
about TMM in my Anime Insider mag. Also, if you want to be in the next  
chapter you have to....  
R&R!  
And tell me so! But......  
Flames will be used to build a bazooka and incinerate Masaya's dead body.  
Ichigo: NNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!  
Kyua: There she goes again.... 


	4. Every one's been driven crazy by Kyua, e...

Actions for this chappie will be put in ::s.  
Whassup? Kyua here! I will now anounnce that this fic will have FOUR  
chapters! A major amount! But, only chocolate and reviews keep me going!  
And I am putting in two guest stars this chapter as a thank-you for  
reviewing! :) (FF took away my cool happy eyes. T-T) They are..KrysOfDeath!  
Krys: ::waves:: HI!  
And..err..did I read that right?? Hm?  
Hm: I wish my identity remain a secret.  
O.O; , whatever...  
And now let me introduce you to the most important person on Earth besides  
myself! My muse, who gives me ideas by her everyday antics! Jor-  
::muse runs out and gags Kyua::  
Muse: It's J![1] ::takes off gag::  
O...kay..J, then! J, what's in store this round?  
J: Well, you use Krys's flames to burn Masaya's dead body..  
Krys and Kyua: YAY!! :)))  
J: Annnnddd.. well..why should I tell you?  
Let's get started! ::drags in Kish::  
Kish: You killed me already.  
Kyua: Well, I brought you back.  
Kish: Do I get another shot to win?  
Kish: Maybe, because Krys luvvvss you!  
Krys: ;) Heeyyy...  
Disclaimer: If you haven't already figured this out, these characters are  
not mine. Not even J. She's just a friend who helps out with getting my  
typing program to work and acting up at school. After I play and torture  
them, I have to give them back to Mia Ikumi. But I might keep Masaya, I  
want to poke him with my pointy stick. ::gets chased by lawyers:: Fine,  
I'll give him back, too...  
---------------  
Weakest Link: TMM Style! Voting Time!  
Irritating Voice That Sounds Like J's: We are back. Who will be voted off?  
Kyua: Here we go!  
dum dum da dum  
Kyua: I THOUGHT I BUSTED THOSE! ::busts up speakers even more::  
Kish: ::stands holding her mike and snikering:: Ha, she'll neverrrr know!  
Kyua: Whatever. Who did you vote for? Ichigo?  
Ichigo: ::hits button:: Ryou.  
Mint: ::hits button:: Purin.  
Purin: ::hits button:: Ryou, na no da!  
Ryou: ::hits button:: Mint, she drinks too much tea. And it isn't even  
decaf!  
Mint: WHAT?? You weren't supposed to tell! You promised! ::sob::  
Kyua: OK, Ryou got the most votes, but Mint will have to take the Walk of  
Doom because I hate her.  
Mint: That's not fair!! ...And what's a "Walk of Doom?"  
Kyua: THIS!! ::shoves her in pool of evil mutant terrible horrible  
disturbing plushie animals::  
Mint: AHHHHH!!!  
Evil Mutant Terrible Horrible Disturbing Plushie Animals: Yum! ::chomp,  
chomp::  
Kyua: Serves her right.  
::krys and hm come and take Mint's chewed up body::  
Krys: Why did we get this job??  
J: Because I forced her to type it.  
Krys: Eh..  
Hm: Hmm..  
Kyua: LET ME GO! ::grabs laptop:: Now..let's see..::hands over Kish to Hm::  
Hm: Thankies!  
Kyua: I'll let Krys host. I need my coffee break.  
-Yu-Gi-Oh Land-  
Kyua: Hey Kaiba! Give me your coffee! ::yanks coffee cup out of Seto  
Kaiba's hands::  
Kaiba: HEY! That's my coffeeeee...  
-Break Room-  
Kyua: Ahh..this is the life..::realizes cameras are on her:: GO AWAY!!  
-commercial-  
Mint: Hey, have you ever wanted to be eaten? Wondered why your NORMAL  
plushies couldn't do the job? Because you need the...  
Evil Mutant Terrible Horrible Disturbing Plushie Animals: US!  
Mint: Yes the Plushie Disturbing...err..no..the Animal Plush  
Horri..no..umm..  
-end comercial-  
Krys: Well..err..::throws flowers in the air::  
Ichigo: That's not what you do.  
Krys: thinkingWHY DIDN'T SHE LEAVE ME A SCRIPT??  
Kyua: I'm back! But know..Krys has to be a contestant!  
Krys: No way! I'm leaving! ::disappears in puff of chocolate stuff::  
Purin: CANDY!! ::starts to eat::  
Kyua: SOMEONE PLAY THIS STUPID GAME!!! ::stalks offstage::  
J:Uh, oh..  
Irritating Voice: Why has Kyua snapped? Will she continue? Will she force  
the contestants (or what's left of them) to play something else? Will I  
ever get a real job?  
---------------------------------------------------  
I'm sowy..everybody. KrysOfDeath was put in a very uncomfortable situation.  
Don't kill me! I'll give her a Kish plushie, a Kish teddy bear, and a giant  
poster of Kish to make up for it. ::shoves stuff towards Krys::  
[1] J is a real person named Jordan, she is my best friend and will  
occasionally help me out with this type of stuff.  
Kyua-chan out!! 


End file.
